Dog Mom: (hands Puppy a brand new giant alligator chew toy)… Here. No really, here. This is yours. Do you want it?
Bane: This is a trick. I know this is a trick because it’s big and fluffy like a SLIPPER and I am never ever looking at a slipper again.
Dog Mom: It’s not a slipper, it’s a chew toy. It’s yours.
Bane: I am much too mature now to need a chew toy.
Dog Mom: Yesterday you tore into an old work glove like it was manna from heaven.
Bane: I was young and naive then. I have grown up.
Dog Mom: Okay, fine. Don’t take it. I’ll just put it over here in your favorite chew toy area.
Bane: (waits ’til I’m across the room, picks up the big fluffy alligator and proceeds to lose his mind) A SLIPPER OF MY OWN… WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.
(yes, I bought more than one)
